The Things I Do for You
by FearlessTiger
Summary: It's the small sacrifices Itachi makes for Sasuke that speak of how much he loves him, and maybe the laughing and teasing, but that will remain a secret. 'Itachi, we've been through this. I'm not gay' Non-mass Uchiha brothers love and SasuSaku


_**The Things I Do for You**_

_~Three months old~_

The five year old boy gave his sibling a look of utter tolerance as the infant bellowed his displeasure with the life he had only just started, for a reason Uchiha Itachi could only guess: hunger. Apparently, even though the chubby child had been fed only two hours ago, his little stomach demanded more than the healthy dose of nutrients his mother's milk had offered and, as such, any and all of Itachi's attempts to cease the disturbing yelling were futile.

The little boy mused that such a tantrum would have been infinitely more manageable if it had occurred during the day _and _when their parents were at home. Now, however, due to Itachi's constant display of infinite maturity, he had been entrusted with his brother's safety while Fugaku and Mikoto left the compound to enjoy some rare and well-deserved private time in the late evening.

Of course, the two had given their oldest clear instructions in every possible aspect, from which lullabies Sasuke loved best to techniques of first aid for infants. Ironically, however, the Uchiha matriarch had labeled hunger as a need already satisfied, thus leaving Itachi without proper training for a situation that was, in fact, _occurring_ right now and, frankly, had it not been for the child's aforementioned incredible maturity, he would have joined his sibling in his incoherent, loud tirade.

Despite it being past his bedtime, the clan's heir had watched over the displeased bra- err, angel- patiently, understanding that his Otouto likely needed him.

In truth, at the time, Sasuke had absolutely no idea who the other child was and what purpose he served, but Itachi was five years old and a good brother, and that was all that mattered.

After an hour of singing, talking aimlessly and rocking Sasuke gently, the young prodigy finally decided to get some fresh air, if only to soothe the burning sensation in his temples. He had loved the tiny bundle of life since he first laid eyes on him, but Kami, the boy had limits. At the current time, he seriously contemplated running away and signing himself into the orphanage, because this was completely absurd and downright unjust. He was five and most definitely a male, therefore his keen mind deduced that he was not going to start lactating _anytime soon_. Which meant that he would need to endure this madness until his beloved mother and father decided it would be a nice time to come back to their suffering children.

While Sasuke's lips began to tremble from the unhealthy amount of crying he was doing, Itachi focused on the stars above, entertaining the childish belief that, maybe, if he wished hard enough…

Suddenly, the yelling ceased and the little boy's eyes widened in surprise, as he heaved a sigh of relief simultaneously. Unbelievable. Had the foolish myth actually _worked_..?

''Huaaaaa!''

Nope.

Truthfully, Itachi wanted to just cry. It would be so easy, and no one could really blame him for it, either. His parents would be a bit disappointed, but understanding nonetheless. But no. He couldn't, because if he cried, then who was going to be Sasuke's support? He was his Nī-san, he needed to be strong for his little brother, no matter what. Even if it was exactly Sasuke who was giving him premature white hairs.

''There, there, Sasuke,'' Itachi muttered softly, caressing the infant's red and puffy cheeks with his small fingers. ''It will be alright, I promise.''

'Alright' came very late into the night, in the form of two apologetic-looking parents, who promised to never cause their son so much trouble again. Itachi only glanced at the now peaceful baby, who had eaten to his heart's content and was absorbed in deep sleep. His heart swelled and his onyx eyes filled with tenderness.

The clan's heir looked back to his mother and shook his head, smiling. ''That's okay, Kā-san. Next time, though, you should leave a bottle. Just in case.''

_~Five years old~_

''Nī-san! Nī-san!''

The sound was both endearing and incredibly annoying, and the ten-year-old Genin sighed, pushing his homework away for the time being. He was studying for the upcoming Chunin Exam, not necessarily to pass and be forced into yet another 'Praise-The-Incredible-Heir' absolutely detestable party from his fellow clansmen, but to keep himself alive, really.

However, his Otouto seemed to have other plans entirely and was led by a currently unknown unstoppable force of great enthusiasm that pushed him to even barge into Itachi's room without knocking – despite the countless times the young ninja had told him to do so – and throw himself all over his futon, contagious grin in place and giddiness overcoming his small frame.

The utterly adorable sheepishness of a boy just realizing he had broken a golden rule for the thousandth time had the older Uchiha smothering a chuckle with his palm in order to maintain his intimidating position of authority. ''What do you want, Sasuke?'' he asked, forcing a reprimanding note into his voice just for the sake of reminding the little twerp how he did not like being disturbed from his tasks – even though, to Sasuke's defense, Itachi was _always_ busy with _many_ tasks.

The younger boy giggled nervously, trying to appear cute – and succeeding flawlessly – as he fidgeted, obviously scared of his brother's wrath (a wrath he had never encountered, but always suspected was extremely frightening). ''Nī-san, Chichi bought me wooden shuriken to practice!'' he exclaimed hopefully.

Itachi sighed inwardly, wondering why his little brother always chose the most inopportune moments to ask for his company. He let him continue, though he already knew what Sasuke was about to request.

''You're very good at Shurikenjutsu! Can you teach me?''

The heir looked away from his sibling, completely aware of Sasuke's severe inferiority complex and how he desired so desperately to prove himself to the world and, thus, overcome it. But then again, there was this ridiculously difficult equation his Sensei said the participants last year had needed to solve in the first part of the Exam, and so Itachi smiled apologetically, ready to poke his brother in the forehead and ask for forgiveness for his lack of supportiveness.

Sasuke had already grown accustomed to his sibling's antics, however, and he interrupted before Itachi could once again wave him off. ''You promised yesterday you'd spend time with me!'' he accused, crossing his arms with an adorable pout.

At this, Itachi froze for the briefest of moments, feeling slightly guilty because, in all truth, his Otouto was right. Sasuke had wanted to play hide-and-seek the previous day, but he had refused since his training was about to start in ten minutes at the time. He had managed to escape the imminent tantrum by promising to spend time with Sasuke the next day, a promise that was returning right now to bite him in the back. Itachi sighed. A shinobi is honorable – while not engaged in combat, that is – and Itachi was a shinobi. Therefore, he was honorable. So, he couldn't exactly ignore a promise he had made, mostly because that would set a horrible example for the little boy before him to follow.

As a result, to his slight discomfort and Sasuke's utter joy, Itachi led the way to the clan's training room that was designed specifically for Shurikenjutsu practice, making sure to emphasize the fact that he would only stay _a little_. His words undoubtedly met deaf ears, because Sasuke was so happy with just being in his idol's company that he began jumping up and down excitedly, cradling his fake weapons and eyeing the entire room with big, sparkling eyes.

Itachi set his prodigious Sharingan on one certain target and, within milliseconds, the object was perfectly pierced by a sharp kunai.

Sasuke gasped at his brother's talent and immediately began asking how, when and where to aim to get the same result. The older boy patiently explained the technique and demonstrated it each time he was asked to, amusedly watching his sibling completely miss each time he tried to mimic his movements, but correcting his posture and offering helpful tips nonetheless.

At some point, Itachi realized that this was the first time he'd actually _been_ with Sasuke in more than a few months, and that the radiating happiness on the boy's features was thoroughly justified. Knowing that he was so adored and idolized by this child made Itachi's eyes soften and, when he decided to make a game of the entire training and have both Sasuke and himself aiming for the same targets while engaging in light (slightly immature on the younger party's behalf) conversation and later bickering (when the same younger party began to feel annoyed at the fact that Nī-san _always_ hit the target before him and it was unfair), Itachi saw how his brother was actually _having fun_. Hours passed, and every time the heir tried to end the session, the disappointed yet resigned look on Sasuke's slightly chubby face made him throw another shuriken in his direction (because Itachi never used fakes, to Sasuke's enthusiasm) and just see that contagious smile for a little while longer.

The next day found Uchiha Itachi, prodigy and pride of the Uchiha clan, doing countless pushups on the fields of Konoha's training grounds for not having completed his homework. And later, he was punished again, because he'd done all of his pushups with a clearly visible smile.

_~Ten years old~_

The young ANBU Captain sighed as he drowsily entered his home, consumed physically and emotionally. The assassination mission had been gruesome and, on top of that, he had lost a member of his team to poison. Kakashi-senpai had assured him that there was nothing he could have done for the man and that, if someone really was to blame, it would be him, but Itachi's mood was still foul, as expected from a fifteen-year-old pacifist who absolutely detested witnessing death in more amounts than absolutely necessary.

As usual, his mother greeted him with a smile, completely unperturbed by the blood on his uniform. He forced a reply out of himself for the sake of politeness, but Mikoto immediately noticed his less than pleasant disposition and carefully allowed him the privacy he needed in such moments, refraining from asking about his overall performances and placing a welcome plate of delicious onigiri on the table.

Itachi strained his facial muscles to smile at his mother's thoughtfulness and he received a rare kiss on the forehead that had more purpose than any outsiders would think, then he was left to eat and contemplate life and death in silence, while Mikoto's delicate steps led her upstairs, most likely to clean Sasuke's mess of a room.

Speak of the devil.

''Nī-san!''

The heir wished nothing more than to openly groan and curse the Kami he did not even believe in, because Sasuke was the last drop of liquid in Itachi's mental glass, which was already filled to the brim and about to pour – in a very unpleasant manner.

He somehow managed to maintain his composure by remaining completely still and not giving a single sign of having heard the familiar voice, hoping beyond hope that he would be left alone, if only for a few moments, so he could push the image of a man choking on his own intestines deep into the farthest ends of his mind.

But then again, he had never quite been a lucky individual, if his own name was any indication.

''Nī-san, you're back from your mission!'' the oblivious child said merrily, not paying any heed to the sharp, metallic stench of blood coming from his sibling – after all, after four years, Sasuke had gotten rather used to seeing Itachi (and, occasionally, his father) covered in the liquid, and blood did not affect him any longer.

Itachi counted to ten and bit his onigiri harder than necessary to stop himself from snapping at the child – something which terrified Sasuke terribly due to its sheer rarity. ''Obviously, Sasuke.''

The Academy student grinned sheepishly, still unsuspecting, and seated himself comfortably next to his brother. ''Ano, Nī-san,'' he began a little uncertainly, before deciding to just spit out whatever he was thinking. ''I've been wanting to ask you something for a while, but you were away, so… Can I ask it now?''

Itachi seriously contemplated refusing in the driest manner he could muster, but then he thought better and realized that Sasuke was going to pester him until he accepted anyway, which just did not do for his wish for solitude at the moment. He sighed resignedly, and the younger boy took this as a sign to go on.

''Where do babies come from?''

At that, Itachi suddenly became thankful for the fact he hadn't been drinking anything, because he was sure he would have choked on the substance when hearing that question. Of all possible times, _now_?

Alright. Kami perhaps did actually exist, in the form of a devil who only wished to make his life miserable.

On the outside of Itachi's troubled mind, all Sasuke saw was a mild twitch of his left eyebrow. ''Sasuke, you already know that.''

Surprisingly, the child shook his head stubbornly and Itachi actually got annoyed. He remembered clearly how _he himself_ had used a _bunshin _to properly explain to his sibling how women and men were different and in which areas exactly, _therefore _telling him that children came from a woman's vagina when they were nine months into the pregnancy and going into labor. And now he had the audacity to claim that-

''I know _where _they come from, but… How do they get there? I mean, does the lady use a Jutsu to make herself pregnant? And, if so, how does the baby have a father?'' Sasuke asked, his onyx eyes glowing with curiosity and innocence, and later with sheer surprise, because Itachi was always composed, so why was he banging his head on the table… repeatedly?

''…Nī-san?'' the youngest of the two said uncertainly, wondering if his beloved brother was under some form of peculiar Genjutsu. In response, Itachi only hit himself harder and Sasuke was ready to call for his mother in fear when…

''It is called sex, Otouto,'' the heir's voice sounded as if he were in pain, but Sasuke was much too preoccupied with the new concept to care for Itachi's wellbeing any longer.

Meanwhile, the young Captain braced himself for what was to come, silently resenting his parents for letting _him _deal with this, when it was, in fact, their responsibility.

The imminent innocent question of 'What is sex?' followed and Itachi found himself explaining with the faintest blush terms such as arousal, foreplay, orgasm and ejaculation, stressing the points that everything was completely normal, though very private and somehow managing to avoid the awkwardness by speaking in scientific terms and making references to what Sasuke had to be learning in Anatomy class at the Academy, all while the face of a dying man begging him to ask the Hokage to ensure his wife and children would have a source of income clouded his vision.

When his speech was over, Sasuke's cheeks were tainted a rosy shade, but his intelligent mind managed to put all the pieces together and form a somewhat understandable puzzle, before wordlessly scampering to his room, most likely to allow his ten-year-old brain to further digest the life-changing piece of information.

Itachi sighed and massaged his throbbing temples. Of all the things he'd done today, having The Talk with Sasuke was the most unexpected of them all. In his humble opinion, the unwritten rule that it was compulsory for all children to know of these things before becoming Genin was highly idiotic, but that may have been his disposition talking.

Noticing his mother lingering in the doorway with a knowing smirk, Itachi glared half-heartedly, since they both knew that she was the one supposed to do what he had just done.

That night, the heir went to sleep while being plagued by a completely foul mood. The next day, however, Sasuke came home gloating for the entire Fire Country to hear about how he bested a certain Haruno Sakura in Anatomy, and, if Itachi managed to keep the smile off his face at the scene, the wink Mikoto sent him completely ruined his façade.

_~Thirteen years old~_

As his mother continued to mindlessly check on all the ovens, prepare desert and arrange the table like a madwoman, Uchiha Itachi made himself completely and utterly comfortable on the futon, not because he disrespected his parent by any means, but because he was _slightly_ closer to Sasuke than she was, and the Genin had just so conveniently happened to confess to him that his teammates were most likely going to be – as he had put it – freaked out if the Uchiha family placed them in front of a formal, extravagant dinner – which was exactly what Mikoto was aiming to do, for practicality's sake, of course.

Itachi had done his best in convincing his mother to relax and prepare something casual, but years and years of being the leading lady of what was considered to be a noble clan must have finally taken their toll on her. Therefore, there she was, cooking seven different courses and cleaning and perfuming the house like a maniac, all while Itachi, having refused to help for the sake of the two pre-teenagers, indulged in a rare moment of watching television, dressed casually – mind you – in a grey yukata.

His mind refusing to focus on the screen, the ANBU Captain began to amusedly think of how exactly the following dinner was going to take place. It was time for Sasuke to introduce his teammates to the family, and Mikoto had kindly sent a polite invitation to dinner to both of them – unknowingly scaring the poor children to death with her formality, as Sasuke had later told him with an extremely annoyed expression, because, apparently, Naruto had begged him to allow him not to come and Sakura almost had an aneurism – again, his words – because she didn't know how to dress for the occasion.

Itachi chuckled at the thought. He had never personally met the two, but Sasuke had rambled about them continuously ever since Team 7 was formed, which spoke volumes about his emotions – to his brother, at least. What the heir had come to learn was that, despite the fact that Naruto was defined as 'an incurable idiot' and Sakura was 'annoying as hell', Sasuke cared for both of them more than Itachi would have expected. As a result, he was quite anticipating the encounter: he wanted to find out the duo's _qualities_, as well, because such thing was absolutely impossible to talk out of Sasuke. What a little prick he had become.

''Kā-san! I told you not to overdo it! They're going to run off and drown themselves!''

The irritated voice was unmistakable and Itachi actually turned to see what exactly in the big picture had angered his sibling to the point where he actually had the courage to accuse his mother of something. The moment he laid eyes on the arrangement of exotic flowers and the _freaking chocolate fountain_, Itachi sighed, standing to join his Otouto, who was currently being scolded by Mikoto for his apparent lack of fundamental notions regarding hospitality.

''Kā-san, really…'' Itachi tried, eyeing her dark blue kimono disapprovingly and already moving to remove the flowers from the table. The woman looked downright confused – her oldest, too?

''What kind of dinner do _you two_ have in mind?'' she asked, hand on her hip – the standard position for dangerously annoyed women.

Itachi was about to respond patiently, but his hot-tempered sibling beat him to it, gesturing to the entire immaculate and rather exaggeratedly extravagant living room.

''The kind where my male teammate doesn't feel like the lowest scum for not knowing which fork to use – scratch that - _how _to use a fork, and my female teammate doesn't break down in the middle of a conversation for suddenly feeling inadequate because she isn't a part of a rich clan that can actually afford such formalities!'' the pajama-clad Genin snapped loudly, leaving his mother and brother quite speechless.

On the one hand, Mikoto actually looked to the floor in shame, because the Uzumaki _was_ her deceased best friend's son, after all.

On the other hand, Itachi silently marveled at the amount of _consideration_ Sasuke had just openly displayed for not one, but _two _people he wasn't even related to, and his anticipation increased tenfold. Who were these shinobi?

By the time the doorbell rang, the entire house had been rearranged to fit a casual mood by the combined effort of all four family members (how his mother managed to convince Uchiha Fugaku himself to partake in domestic activities, Itachi would never know, but forever admire) and, despite the widely spread stereotype that all Uchiha were emotionally constipated, arrogant killing machines (where had this label even been conceived?), everything looked cheerful and homely.

Sasuke, also dressed in a dark blue yukata, opened the door to reveal what must have been the cutest picture since baby Sasuke Itachi's eyes had ever been laid upon, which consisted of two incredibly short, fidgeting pre-teenagers. The blonde male was dressed in an obnoxiously orange long-sleeved shirt and maroon jeans Sasuke's eyes widened a little at (and Itachi deduced the boy had never worn them before) and the girl, whose hair was pink – though, admittedly, he had been prepared for this – wore a knee-length red dress, with straps that embraced her neck smoothly, and Itachi had to inwardly commend her on fashion sense, since that outfit could be considered both casual and elegant, depending on the environment.

Not able to help himself, he made a perfect analysis of their overall personality just by this one first glance: Naruto appeared to be the take-me-as-I-am, contagiously cheerful type, while Sakura liked playing safe – most definitely not a risk taker, which was good in the shinobi world – but she was extremely shy and quite nervous.

As they bowed – Sakura bowed and elbowed Naruto so he'd do the same, to the amusement of the watchers – and took off their shoes, Itachi noticed Sasuke glaring at him from the corner of his eye, obviously knowing what he had done and disliking it completely. Had they not had guests, the Captain would have poked him in the forehead teasingly, but, as it was, he just smiled at the two Genin, who admittedly looked more like frightened mice.

After they muttered a rather shaky 'Hajimemashite', Sasuke stepped to their side and properly introduced them to his waiting family. ''These are my teammates, Uzumaki Naruto and Haruno Sakura,'' he stated what everyone already knew, before nodding back to his relatives. ''These are my parents and brother.''

Itachi heard Naruto mumble something that sounded suspiciously like 'No shit,' before he moaned in sudden pain. Upon further inspection, he saw the girl's finger pressing firmly between two of his ribs, while she smiled to Mikoto and Fugaku politely.

Itachi instantly shared an amused glance with his parents and, upon mutual understanding, they turned around simultaneously and led the way to the living room, hearing the expected whispered outburst occur at their backs.

''Baka! Where do you go saying things under your breath around three Jonin?!''

''It's up to you if you make my family hate you, Usuratonkachi!''

''Doesn't that mean they can hear the two of you too, dattebayo?''

Everything turned eerily silent after that and all three adults had to hide their chuckles. This was more entertaining than expected.

As they seated themselves at the table, with Mikoto and Fugaku at the front and two free seats next to Sasuke and Itachi respectively, the ongoing fight between Naruto and Sakura over the safety of the chair next to Sasuke was painfully evident and ultimately lost by the rosette, not because she lacked in strength when she stepped on her enemy's foot, but because Naruto had absolutely no tact or desire to at least keep the battle subtle, therefore Sakura had to give in and slump in her chair before the Jinchūriki could yell something like 'There's no way in hell I'm sitting next to that creeper!'

Itachi immediately noticed how she desperately tried to look anywhere but at him and how her knees began to tremble slightly and he suddenly wondered what the _heck _Sasuke had told his teammates about him. A questioning look sent to the specific young Uchiha regarding the skittishness of the two pre-teens had Sasuke avoiding his gaze and biting his lip and that was it – he had to know, and, based on the answers, ensure that his brother would lose the ability to speak for a week _at least._

''So, Naruto-kun, Sakura-chan,'' he started warmly, eyebrow twitching subtly at the way they jumped as if electrocuted. ''Before I ask you about yourselves, I'd like to present myself. Though, I'd also like to know if you are even a small bit familiar with my person,'' he stated, and couldn't have been more obvious, because Sasuke suddenly began to sweat and stare at his sashimi like it was divine salvation.

Naruto laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head when he noticed Sasuke's parents expecting an answer to that question as well. ''Well, Sasuke-tem – _ouch!_ – _Sasuke _talks about you a lot.''

Itachi feigned surprise. ''Is that so?''

The female beside him shifted and offered a weak, almost tortured smile. ''H-hai. He always tells us about your impressive performances and it's pretty clear he idolizes you,'' she said, ignoring the glare she received from Sasuke for telling Itachi such – perfectly obvious – secrets.

The Captain, however, realized her strategy. So, she was going to abandon the Sasuke-ship to get on _his_ good side, which was quite predictable for a kunoichi – out of the two siblings, even an incurably idiotic man could see just whose revenge was more painful. And, just because of that, the betrayal on Sasuke's face was completely and mercilessly ignored.

Naruto, however, being incredibly loyal by nature, made the brave decision to let his face form a frown. ''That's true and all, but it also sounds like Sasuke doesn't get much attention,'' he mused just half-accusingly, also ignoring the way the poor Genin in question ungracefully choked on his food. Had the dobe just dared to-

''Ahh, Naruto-kun, but you know that's just not true!'' Sakura intervened rapidly, schooling her features into an admiring smile that was immediately aimed towards Itachi. ''He always tells us how you taught him so many techniques and that's really… sugoi, ne, Sasuke-kun?''

Looking between Sakura, whose eyes clearly told him 'Agree with me right now or die, peasant' and Naruto, who looked just about ready to obliviously begin arguing about how Sasuke, _in fact_, always _complained _that Itachi never taught him anything and everything was about Itachi _all the time_, Sasuke really tried to make up his mind and decide which one of them he was going to team up with, so he also tried to come up with a coherent statement.

''Hn.''

As almost palpable electricity gathered around the three Genin, Fugaku and Mikoto came to the conclusion that, yes, the Hokage _had_ been right to warn them that their youngest son's teammates eerily resembled Jiraiya and Tsunade of the Sannin, therefore, all further attempts at somewhat civil conversation were downright futile. They were alright with this fact, because, if the two really resembled those legends so well, it meant that Sasuke was in good hands. And that was all they'd wanted to make sure of.

''Ne, ne, Fugaku-kun,'' Mikoto said sweetly, stopping the ongoing mental confrontation between the three and Itachi's trail of thought as he was internally debating which one of the three was cutest (Sakura was admittedly good competition, but Sasuke still won Itachi's heart). ''I think we should leave the children to get to know each other better.''

Itachi froze. _No_. They were _not_ going to do what they'd done to him his entire life. The Talk he'd had with Sasuke years ago had decidedly been the last straw. He was not going to play parent not only with his brother, but with two other equally deranged children as well.

His father lifted himself from his seat with a self-satisfied smirk and the eighteen-year-old knew that that was _exactly_ what his parents were about to do to him. And he couldn't refuse, damn it, because, if _they_ left, who was going to stay with the guests? What Fugaku and Mikoto were doing was already impolite enough (which was quite ironic, if he remembered his mother's adamant wish to prepare the house for the arrival of someone of equal importance as the _Daimyo_), so he just couldn't get out of this.

Before any of the two guests could speak, the duo erased their existence with a poof and Itachi found himself making up a believable excuse for his parents' sudden departure, who were now enjoying a very different type of candlelit dinner – he just _knew_ – and probably laughing at their oldest son's expense.

Sasuke, suddenly very relieved at being saved from having to explain to his sibling how he had told his teammates that Itachi could shatter their hearts in a heartbeat (pun completely intended) with just his Sharingan, thus scaring Naruto and Sakura out of their barely sane minds, eyed his brother with his glimmering onyx orbs, knowing that his eyes had always been Itachi's undoing.

When said older brother looked down to see not one, but _three_ pairs of shiny, beautiful eyes staring up at him expectantly, he did the only thing an eighteen-year-old young adult could do to take revenge on his parents, and that was grabbing their saved money and smirking at the Genin team.

''Why don't we continue this at the Amusement Park? My treat, of course.''

_~Sixteen years old~_

Itachi grunted to prevent the potentially life-threatening chuckle from escaping his lips. It was true that, although Sasuke had grown greatly in skill and mind and body, he still was no match for him, but the ANBU was still cautious around his sibling when he was _this_ –for lack of a better word- pissed.

And, in all truth, the Chunin was likely plotting someone's death while glaring at his brother hatefully. Itachi pondered that the look _might_ have been more intimidating if they weren't seated comfortably on the futon in Sasuke's bedroom. They rarely engaged in sessions of chit chat because they were both busy with their duties, but this had been an emergency. This was something unheard of. This was something Itachi had been willing to bet would never happen.

''You are…'' he began, unable to stop the series of chuckles this time. ''…In love. With a _female_.''

Sasuke's Sharingan flared and he looked ready to pounce, disregarding all common sense and brotherly affection. ''Itachi, we've been through this. I'm _not gay_!'' he growled, tomoe spinning rapidly in his state of sheer irritation.

The normally composed adult gripped his sides as an extremely rare fit of laughter overcame his body, because, if anyone else had told him this, he would have snorted in their face. Sasuke had _never_ showed any interest in the opposite sex – and not in the way Itachi always maintained his professional attitude. Granted, the heir was not looking for a stable relationship – and he doubted he ever would, to the entire female population's chagrin – but he _would_ comment on a woman's beauty if she caught his attention (as he had learned _not_ to do with Sasuke's teammate, because any and all compliments at her address somehow translated into a perverse code only the younger Uchiha's deranged mind could understand, which turned him into an unreasonable protective machine that would not stop berating the culprits until brought back to reality by a powerful, albeit deserved punch from the same teammate he was so obsessed with protecting from mere human _eyes_).

Sasuke, however, putting aside the decidedly unhealthy protective nature when it came to Haruno Sakura, had never looked at a girl twice and, when asked to give his opinion about a certain specimen, he would either shrug in a bored fashion or frown in disgust (_or_ turn completely feral and curse his unlucky companion with a rather painful tirade if said specimen was Sakura).

Itachi had thus come to the conclusion that there were two existing possibilities: a) Sasuke had romantic feelings for his teammate – which was rather unlikely, because all three males in Team 7 reacted in the exact same way as him when their 'princess' (as Itachi teasingly called her) was concerned, or b) Sasuke was gay, which was much more logical, simply because women appeared to leave him unimpressed and Itachi found the term asexual to be a bit too alarming to attach to his Otouto.

He'd sincerely hoped Sasuke was homosexual, for the sake of the clan. Itachi doubted he would ever marry, so, if Sasuke didn't, either, regardless of the spouse being male or female, then things were going to become rather unpleasant. If he was gay, they could always adopt.

That had been Itachi's philosophy until today, when a rather frightened Otouto of his had wordlessly dragged him to his bedroom to confess that he had fallen in love. With _a girl_.

Only when a pillow crashed into his face did the ANBU realize he had been laughing continuously for the past five minutes, while Sasuke was nearing borderline madness, glaring at him with glowing crimson eyes.

Itachi took a deep breath to collect himself, mentally noting that he had never laughed so much and so hard in his entire lifespan. ''Now, Sasuke,'' he said calmly, though amusement still glimmered in his dark eyes. ''Who is this… _girl_?'' he could not help but stress the word teasingly, causing Sasuke's scowl to deepen considerably.

Despite being very, very angry at his brother, the Chunin was obviously embarrassed by the question and he blushed almost too cutely, moving his heated glare to the wall and muttering a name under his breath so softly not even Itachi's trained ears could hear it.

''What was that?'' the older brother repeated his question, inching closer to hear the name of the miracle woman who had managed to convert his relative to heterosexuality – because, despite everything else, Itachi would _always_ believe Sasuke had been gay, at least at some point. The ANBU was willing to bet his life that he already knew the answer, but he wanted Sasuke to admit it aloud.

The younger male glared even harder. ''_Sakura_,'' he said infinitely louder, blushing madly when his sibling smirked at him. The bastard had known all along, and yet he'd forced him to admit it verbally. Damned jerk of a brother he had.

Itachi chuckled at having ruffled his Otouto's feathers and crossed his legs, eyeing him expectantly.

''What?'' Sasuke snapped, blush still in place and scowl unmovable. The fact that the corner of his brother's mouth rose only served to irk him further.

''Well?'' Itachi answered his question with a question and Sasuke huffed, crossing his arms in indignation. ''Well, _what_?'' he retorted heatedly.

The ANBU merely lifted an eyebrow. ''Are you not going to tell her?''

Sasuke actually spluttered. ''N-_no_!''

Itachi felt a chuckle coming up his throat again at his brother's absolutely adorable teenage drama. He was no fool. He knew exactly why the Chunin had come to him: he had absolutely _no idea_ what to do with his newfound feelings, but he was still mature enough to realize that, if he were to try and manage them by himself, he would fail. Miserably.

As he was right now, for that matter.

The heir sighed patiently. ''Sasuke, if you love her, tell her. You know she's had feelings for you since day one,'' he reasoned with the adolescent, noticing how he went from facial expression to facial expression, each change showing his growing anxiety.

Eventually, Sasuke scowled. ''Can't _she_ come up and tell me first, if she loves me?''

''She already did, foolish little brother,'' Itachi countered, recalling the poor girl's tear-stained face as she embraced a barely conscious Sasuke after the disaster that had been their Chunin Exam. He remembered how she'd spoken through the bruises all over her face, telling the young boy to never frighten her to that extent because she was in love with him. It had touched Itachi, really, but Sasuke had been too emotionally immature at the time to comprehend her feelings – let alone return them – but maybe he was on the good path. Itachi even had a small scar on his back from when he'd cracked a simple joke on Sakura to serve as proof.

Sasuke looked lost. ''Can't she just do it again?'' he tried pathetically, responding to the nonplussed look his brother gave him by groaning. ''Nī-san, this is harder than it seems.''

Because he was in the confines of his home, Itachi allowed himself to snort. ''Sasuke, listen to yourself. You can't confess to a girl who already claimed she loves you?''

For a shinobi who had been labeled as 'Flee-on-Sight' on the battlefield, Sasuke could be quite the sissy.

''But what if she doesn't anymore?''

''Sasuke.''

''She and Naruto have gotten really close, y'kno-''

''_Sasuke_.''

The stop-giving-me-crap in Itachi's voice was evident and the younger Uchiha sighed, perhaps finally realizing how unnecessarily dramatic he was being. The room was silent for a few moments, and Itachi tasted his victory with a smirk, poking his brother in the forehead and standing up so he could finally finish his momentarily postponed report. ''Buy her a rose and take her out to dinner. You'll have a Genjutsu spar with me if you chicken out.''

With that, he walked away, leaving a wide-eyed Sasuke to stumble for his money and a nice outfit.

The entire Konoha was shocked the next day to hear that the supposedly asexual second heir of the Uchiha clan had actually confessed his love to his long-time teammate and they now formed a happy couple, but Itachi just congratulated himself for having been completely successful in dealing with – and _solving_ – teenage drama, also treating himself to a serving of mitarashi dango for good measure.

_~Twenty-five years old~_

''Kyaaaa!'' the woman who was currently crushing several bones in Itachi's hand wailed and, admittedly, he would have done the same, had it not been for the healthy dose of respect he had for what she was going through. ''Where's the damned bastard?!'' Sakura yelled as another contraction shook her very being and her hand gripped the man's wrist even tighter than before, while he struggled to mentally praise her for her insane power and not curse her for it.

At least he was not the only one forced to endure Uchiha Sakura's labor pain, for Konoha's Jinchūriki was on her other side, grumbling words about Itachi's brother that were decidedly vitriolic. Sakura could not care less for the pain she was causing her best friend and her brother-in-law, and she had made that point crystal clear during the first few hours of her suffering, telling Naruto that they were shinobi, so they'd better endure.

While those hours had been somewhat manageable, the next few turned into a downright catastrophe, because, like the craving pregnant woman she still was, Sakura wanted Sasuke. Which was quite the problem, because that particular shinobi was and had been on a reconnaissance mission to Kirigakure for the entire week, and the summons Lady Tsunade had sent to alert him of his wife's state had gotten lost in the mist, causing it to be almost unforgivably late. As a result, as Sakura was in her seventh hour of agony, Sasuke was just starting the journey back home – though, judging by how paranoid he had behaved for the entirety of Sakura's pregnancy, the journey was bound to be a very fast one.

Either way, Itachi and Naruto could do nothing to comfort the wailing woman but allow her to possibly permanently damage their hands in her agony.

''A-ano, Sakura-chan…'' the blonde stammered, his entire face contorted in pain. ''Could you grip my other hand? I, uh, think this one just broke.''

Sakura looked as though she was contemplating this, but a wave of pain wiped all sympathy from her sweaty features. ''No, you _tem__ē_! I want this one! This one-aaaah! Sasuke, you stupid hypersexual bastard!'' she began yelling again, frightening the nurses that had gathered around her, if only to watch the spectacle.

Itachi really did try. ''Now, now, Sakura. It will be alright, calm down…''

''Don't you tell me to calm down, you- you- you brother of a traitorous Uchiha asshole who can't keep it in his pants!''

Needless to say, all Itachi did for the rest of the time until Tsunade entered the room was rub her knuckles comfortingly with the fingers he could still feel, share pained glances with Naruto and keep very, _very_ silent.

When the woman was ordered to push, the terror increased tenfold – and so did her tantrums. He had never heard his brother's name and so many insulting terms in the same sentence ever before, but he supposed it was normal, especially coming from the highly temperamental woman. Naruto had made the mistake to actually look at what was going on and he now looked positively traumatized, only muttering some comforting words every now and then when he couldn't stand hearing her scream like that any longer.

Tsunade suddenly gave Sakura a hard glare. ''I see its head! Come on, Sakura, push!''

Unexpected bursts of courage filled both males' hearts at the prospect of the torture finally coming to an end and their encouraging became more enthusiastic, from 'Come on, Sakura, just a little more' gentle reassuring to more blunt – and infinitely more appealing to the enraged woman – 'I'll help you kill the bastard after this is over!' pain-driven promises.

And then the infant was finally pushed out, and the exhausted Uchiha matriarch collapsed completely after twelve hours of horrible, _horrible_ labor. The only two people who had been allowed inside glanced at their visibly crushed hands and cringed slightly, but they both took a peek – one much more subtly than the other – at the new Uchiha heir, who, apparently, was a beautiful little girl who was a precise replica of her father, only the round shape of her small, chubby face suggesting who her mother was.

Naruto immediately began pestering Tsunade to let him hold the newborn, while Itachi remained seated at Sakura's side and gave her an encouraging smile. ''Well done, little sister.''

The tired kunoichi returned the gesture and was about to respond, when a monstrous scandal erupted outside, angered voices of several nurses clashing with one single determined man, who eventually kicked the door open (and every woman who tried to stop him, as well) and made his way directly to his wife, looking tired and unkempt, but happy to see her relaxed form nonetheless.

Tsunade sent the nurses scattering with a yell as she eyed her student carefully, also noticing the way Itachi and Naruto moved a safe distance away from her when she laid her eyes on the one she recently renamed 'the bastard' (along some other, much, much more insulting names). The Hokage gripped the infant in her arms protectively, unwilling to hand it to either of its parents right now, and for a good reason.

''Temē!'' Sakura predictably lunged, her movements only halted by Naruto's good hand grabbing her by the waist and holding her in place, while Sasuke sighed apologetically and began explaining his situation and how he ran as fast as he could, and what else could he have done, all while Sakura tried to break free by using her teeth, gradually ceased her attempts as her sanity finally returned and eventually – finally – jumped into her husband's arms, complaining (whining) about how it was so horrible and she never wanted to go through that again as Sasuke tactfully agreed with her every statement, mouthing 'Thank you's and 'I'm so sorry's to his brother and best friend over the woman's shoulder, receiving warm smiles in return.

The Hokage finally cleared her throat and both Sasuke and Sakura fixated their stares on her immediately, or rather on _what she was holding_. Slowly, they began walking towards the blonde woman and gently, _carefully_ took a look at their daughter, as if she was going to break if they looked too hard. Sakura began to choke on happy tears as she glanced back up at her mentor. ''C-can I…?''

Wordlessly, the child was handed to her with a smile and she barely felt Sasuke's arm wrap around her shoulders as they stood in the middle of the hospital room, just staring at their child.

Itachi watched his sibling's features soften with endless amounts of love and tenderness, and he decided that Sasuke's obvious, bubbling happiness was definitely worth the physical and emotional trauma he had experienced during the previous twelve hours. He eventually walked closer to the little family and eyed his niece lovingly, contemplating for the millionth time how his Otouto's joy had always, _always_ affected him as well.

_~Current time~_

''What are you doing out here, Nī-san?'' Sasuke questioned curiously, approaching his brother, who was sitting on a porch in the middle of the night, walking carefully over a few stairs while cradling his six months old daughter in his arms. Itachi eyed his sibling with a smile, noting how Sakura was most likely asleep and Sasuke had probably engaged in a late-night stroll throughout the large Uchiha compound with his restless child.

The younger of the two adults wordlessly took a seat next to his brother, urging him to hold his niece with a smirk when the bundle of energy began playing with her uncle's bangs, smiling toothlessly.

Itachi smiled at the cuteness before him and stroked her dark hair gently while glancing at his sibling, whose question still lingered. ''I was thinking, Sasuke. Reminiscing, to be exact.''

Sasuke snorted. ''In the middle of the night?''

He got a barely visible shrug as a response and rolled his eyes, accustomed to his brother's peculiarity by now. Silence lingered for a while longer, then the younger Uchiha spoke again.

''What were you thinking about?'' he asked softly, eyes still on his very much awake daughter.

''You.''

The answer was surprising and Sasuke lifted a questioning brow, but he only received an armful of child and a poke on the forehead in response to his quiet inquiry.

''Go to sleep, Sasuke. Sakura might be worried if she wakes up and sees you gone,'' Itachi said with a smile, already standing and walking towards the entrance to his small, modest home.

Sasuke watched his retreating back until the older man shut the door behind him, and then he sighed. His brother had always been a strange, mysterious individual, and that fact was not going to change anytime soon, Sasuke knew. He quietly made his way back to his house, rocking his daughter gently with high hopes of getting her to sleep – no such luck.

In the end, Sasuke was left staring at the ceiling in his room, thinking of his older brother while Uchiha Itachi smiled into his cup of tea, wondering what other unfathomable things his Otouto would make him do for him – that's what being a big brother meant, ne?

**Xxxx**

**AN: Man, this was a monster to write. Anyway, I hoped you liked it, it really just hit me all of a sudden that I wanted to write something for Itachi and Sasuke and this beast came out. Since I'm absolutely in love with the Non-mass verse, this is obviously Non-mass – and I made Genin Sakura a little more mean towards Sasuke because I figured that, since his family is alive and all, he doesn't have that bad-boyish attitude and is thus much easier to whip around (like I constantly pray she will in the manga SOON).**

**ANYWAY, I wanted to say that, um, it's spring break and I'm really, really bored, so if you happen to have any story request that includes Sakura (I just cannot write a **_**Naruto **_**fic without Sakura in it) and any of these pairings: Sasuke x Sakura, Itachi x Sakura, Naruto x Sakura and any other pairings of other characters (I don't really care who they end up with), feel free to PM me and give me something to actually work on instead of procrastinating full time! Thanks for reading and perhaps reviewing and have a great spring!**


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